Why feeling our pain is the only way forward

July 10, 2017

It was incredible to see Marianne Williamson last week. I have been following her for the last five years and her book A Return To Love based on a course in miracles has been transformational for me in how I have been able to change my perception of particular situations using the metaphysical concepts she describes. As she says darkness is only absence of light, and hate is absence of love. In her recent lecture she said that when we desensitise our own pain we desensitise ourselves to others pain and this really hit home for me. Most of my twenties I numbed out with drugs or any other distraction to avoid feeling pain and uncomfortable emotions but in this state not only was I uncompassionate to myself but I didn’t have empathy for others as I was not in a space to understand anyone’s pain for I was fundamentally avoidant. I didn’t consciously know that in order to heal we must go through our pain and really feel it. We were made to have emotions for a reason, all emotions Are spiritually gifted to us to act as signals and to deepen our understanding in life of the contrasts that are absolutely necessary to create real and deep fulfilment. We only know darkness from light, black from white, happiness from sadness. Marianne Williamson says if we have 20 tears to cry we must not withhold and only cry 15. Sadness is a normal human emotion and numbing ourselves is to create space from our relationship to god and spirit, the soul of who we are. We were made to feel and to feel deeply. The worst part of being numb to our pain is that we are unable to be of service to others in distress as we can’t pour from an empty cup. I was always the one that needed the help and deep down I knew I wanted to be able to bring value to others and yet I didn’t realise that our value is built upon our experience and that our suffering would ultimately give us this power. When we remember our oneness and that pain is a collective experience we can let go of the fear that feeling our emotions is in some way wrong. Fear is an illusion of the mortal mind and only arises when we think we are separate from god and one and other. X

 


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